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Lawsuits of the Damned

Not even Hell would take these cases.

Archive for January, 2006

“The current actions of the RIAA are not in my artists’ best interests”

Friday, January 27th, 2006

Let’s hear it for Terry McBride, Nettwerk chief executive, for taking a stand against the RIAA’s cosa nostra tacticts. Nettwerk — one of the largest labels and artist managemet companies in Canada — is funding the defense for the Gruebel family and will foot the bill should they lose the case.

No artistic merit?

Friday, January 27th, 2006

What? A naked dairy fight has no artistic merit? And did you know that South Korea has a Nude Models Association?

MPAA: Do as I say, not as I do

Tuesday, January 24th, 2006

Welly well. The Motion Picture Association of America might face a difficult case, as filmmaker Kirby Dick accuses them of illegally copying his film after he submitted it for rating. In return, the MPAA is accusing Dick of trying to generate free publicity for the film by dragging them through the mud.

To compound the irony, the film — This Film Is Not Yet Rated — explores the shadowy double standards at the MPAA when it comes to rating films on sexual and violent content.

On top of everything, a sexist pig.

Friday, January 20th, 2006

A Kansas woman whose boss turned out to be Wichita’s BTK serial killer has
sued him for gender discrimination

Google Is Not Evil

Friday, January 20th, 2006

Which is more than we can say for Yahoo, Microsft and AOL. In case you haven’t heard (since this one is pretty hot), Google is refusing to hand over search records to an inordinately curious Justice Department. This is in contrast to the aforementioned search “giants,” who sent over the records along with a box of chocolates and a smarmy note thanking the government for this opportunity to serve.

Why all this? It seems that Attorney General Gonzales, who is mighty disturbed by all the dirty, dirty, filthy, dirty porn available on the internets, wants his people to pore over search terms. Dirty, dirty search terms. Remember: Porn is priority one in the new Justice Department!

“Tom is famously very litigious…”

Thursday, January 19th, 2006

Diminutive film star Tom Cruise has threatened South Park with some Courtroom Fireworks if they show that episode again. You know, the one where he won’t come out of the closet.

Michael Jackson, 1 for 2!

Thursday, January 19th, 2006

In what is sure to result in the consumption of several cases of ‘Jesus Juice’, a complaint filed by PETA against Michael Jackson was dropped after a USDA specialist declared that Jackson’s exotic menagerie — we’re talking about the animals now — was in fine shape, and not in violation of whatever code regulates private zoos maintained by in absentia weirdos.

Unfortunately, in a related topic, veterinarian Dr. Martin Dinnes is seeking payment on a delinquent bill of close to $100,000 for ‘nearly weekly’ care of the beasties. That may sound exhorbitant, until you start to consider the need to administer elephant suppositories.