Tony Randall and Jack Klugman singing. Just as awesome as it sounds. Check it out here.

I just caught wind of the Rap Cat controversy, re: the carry-out bags that double as ghetto fabulous street duds for your tabby. First of all, I want to say that I totally support Rap Cat. He’s completely idiotic, yes, but I think that’s the point. He’s supposed to be idiotic. It’s absurdist parody. Don’t you think if Checkers/Rally’s was serious about Rap Cat they would have, oh, I don’t know, made him look a little bit less like a goddamn puppet?

Anyway, the bags. I don’t know if the people who are complaining about this promoting animal cruelty have ever been in a room with a cat and a bag. If there is some inherent danger in this equation, cats don’t seem to give a shit - they’ll get in that bag every time (especially if it smells like greasy french fries). And they usually go head first, which seems much more dangerous than what Checkers suggests (legs first, but only after you cut out leg holes so Puss in Bag can still maneuver). If anything, Checkers/Rally’s is trying to prevent animal cruelty. They even print a warning to over-eager pet owners that reads “Caution: Not all cats will be down with wearing this bag. Do not harm or endanger any cat.”

Sounds pretty responsible to me. Checkers/Rally’s knows that cats like bags. They’re just making it slightly safer and more fun for their owners. Look, it may not be a perfect idea, but you have to admit it’s better than Colonel Sanders’ Rooster Torture & Preperation Kit.

P.S. I have no idea why Checkers isn’t pluralized and Rally’s is. I also have no idea why they don’t just pick one name for the entire country.

Well, it looks like the long-awaited Germs movie What We Do Is Secret will finally be hitting screens this July. Tracking the rise and fall of L.A.’s most storied punk band, the film stars Shane West as self-destructive singer Darby Crash, Rick Gonzalez as irrepressible guitarist Pat Smear, Noah Segan as spacey drummer Don Bolles, and Bijou Phillips as something-something bassist Lorna Doom (don’t know much about her personality - sorry, Lorna). The trailer can be viewed here.

If you ask me, that three minutes and twenty-eight seconds really dances the line between stupid and incredibly stupid. The whole concept of a Germs movie seems kind of faulty. They were a fantastic band and Darby Crash was an interesting guy, but why are we getting this before an Iggy Pop biopic? Is it because Darby was gay/bisexual? Are they looking for a Brokeback Punkers type of thing here? The title kind of suggests that (as do parts of the trailer). Maybe I’m just biased against punk rock drama movies. Can’t think of a single good one. Always painfully overdone and painful to watch.

On the other hand, that line about the taco cracked me up. Maybe What We Do Is Secret won’t be a big fat pile of ghost crap. I’ll give it the benefit of the doubt until July.

EDIT #1: It just dawned on me why we haven’t seen an Iggy biopic - he isn’t dead yet. Unbelievable, considering the life he’s lead.

EDIT #2: Apparently there is an Iggy biopic on the horizon. Thanks for pointing that out, nap.

In 1984, legendary British punk rockers the Damned decided to pay homage to the 1960s garage and psychedelic groups that influenced them by releasing a covers album under the name Naz Nomad & the Nightmares. The album in question was entitled Give Daddy the Knife Cindy and featured the Damned spin on tunes by the Seeds, the Electric Prunes, Kim Fowley, and numerous other forgotten rock pioneers. It’s been out of print for a while, of course, but you can get a taste of the Naz Nomad experience by watching these live clips from 1989 (why they were Nazzing it up that late, I don’t know…I also don’t know why Rat Scabies isn’t in a psychedelic disguise like the rest of them):

“Action Woman”
“Can’t Stand This Love, Goodbye”

Pretty good stuff. Easy to hear how these tunes helped form the crux of the Damned’s famous sound.

Here’s a treat: the Sibling Rivalvry EP featuring Joey Ramone and his bro, Mickey Leigh. Three cool trippy punk tracks (my fave’s “Don’t Be So Strange”). The cover’s pretty funny, too. Thanks, Hangover Heart Attack.

Japan’s Zero Communications recently released three rare Tiny Tim albums for the first time on CD. Chameleon, Wonderful World of Romance, and Stardust all contain historic recordings from Tiny’s sessions with producer Martin Sharp. Where else are you going to get the Eternal Troubadour’s twisted interpretations of “Stayin’ Alive” and “Highway to Hell?” Nowhere, that’s where. Tiptoe over here and pick ‘em up for 2,500 Yen a pop (that’s about $22 American).

Watch out, Old Skull. Run for the hills, Rolling Scabs. There’s a new knee-high punk rock threat in town: Say Uncle. Says nine year old singer Valor, “I hope people know that we have love for our music and that we’re not just showing off.” If you like their stuff, they have t-shirts. Very tempting.

Here’s a “live blog” of this Reptoids CD I got in the mail the other day. It’s like a “Trapped in the Closet” entry, except this disc hasn’t even made it past the unforgiving plains of my coffee table yet.

Reptoids - Park a Tiger

They sound like Sub Pop’s forgotten daughters. Muddy guitars, mumbly vox…Elastica on downers? That seems fair. Reminds me of stuff I’d hear on the radio late afternoons during high school when I was in my room pretending to do homework (but really playing with Star Wars figures and watching MTV on mute). I can handle that. The bassist’s last name is Joffee. That makes me think of Al Jaffee, the guy who did the fold-ins in the back of Mad. Would Jaffee’s offspring change her name to avoid association? Seems plausible. A nice pastiche of tempos and moods on “9 Times.” “Crimes Against Humanity” is the best track, though, and it is the last. Rocks fast, smoothly, punctuates the thickness with skronky guitar breaks. Grungetastic. This is definitely going on my iPod.

Experience the Reptoids for yourself here.